Life Without Fear - No Direction!
I went on a pilgrimage to Santiago de Compostela and there...I died. The most interesting thing aside from walking and...walking was a meeting with this extraordinary guy. Many pilgrims have met David who lives at the edge of the road, offers free fruits and water to the pilgrims (for more information look for Casa de los Dioses). He's been living like that for 9 years. Meeting him felt like visiting a sage from the old tales, who lives somewhere alone hidden in the wilderness. There was something in his eyes, a spark of freedom. I'd like to share with you some of his words that became the main topics of my meditations during the rest of the way.
First we came to the place, a small shelter, wall filled with writings in many languages from many people and baskets with fruits for free. It was really hot and the peaches were so freaking delicious! But this was just the body.
That? It's just a symbol.
said David, who was just approaching us. He greeted us,told us the story of his life, drugs, alcohol, leaving the old life, settling down here, buying the food every day for the money pilgrims donate and talking to people who stop there, showing them that
Life is not just money, life is just career, look around you...
He said that he was actually about to leaving this place in three months. I told him that people might miss him.
No see, no miss! They won't miss me if I'm not here.
How many times did I suffer because of something I couldn't get, something I've lost, something in the future that I was afraid of? What was all this? Thoughts. If I don't see, I don't miss, if I forget, I don't regret nor do I fear. Becoming one with God through the prayer like Jesus, becoming Buddha, reaching enlightenment through meditation, what exactly is it? Some kind of revelation? Learning some secret knowledge? No, it's simply stopping the mind. Not by reasoning, not by arguing and fighting with myself. Simply getting rid of the thoughts. Sending them away right when they appear. No shortcuts, no rituals, no initiations. Everyone can do it.
When you stay at one place, the brains starts to bzzz. Too many thoughts. Move, change, don't stay at one place.
said David to explain why he wants to leave. I have realized that so many negative thoughts are coming to my mind because of the clinging that I didn't even know I've had. Clinging to the normal life. To all the habits one learns, to all the luxury of every day's life to all the visions of the future and memories of the past. Change, change is the way. We have all created this safe zone in our lives that we do not want to leave. We think about the future, imagining how we're going to act, talk, planning every day, the whole life, we think about the past, making sure we did everything we could to be safe now. When we have nothing to do the neurons in our brain start to talk, they start to imagine all the possible dangerous scenarios that might happen forcing us to somehow build another wall around ourselves to be safe. That is the cause of the fear. The fact is that there is no safe zone. When we create something solid in our life, it's always a hindrance on the spiritual way. Be prepared to let everything go. Every success, everything we think we have achieved. We have to fight our own habits, laziness, sometimes even instincts and the very nature of our body but not with suffering! Always aiming and following the good states. Asceticism is not a state where someone throws everything away in tears, suffering and tormenting himself. That is most likely just the ego or even sexuality hidden behind that. True asceticism is about not clinging to anything with a smile on one's face. The actual act of leaving luxury or wealth behind is meaningless if it's not followed by the freedom of mind.
We are not responsible for all the outcomes when we honestly do good. Do our best in the right time and let the rest in God's hands. Isn't it a pride to think that the fate of the whole world depends on us? That we can simply change everything including what other people think? Be humble and don't fear. Fear and trembling are lot of the person who, while stinting effort, hopes that everything will come out precisely as he wants. (Mas Oyama)
We've told him that we started our pilgrimage in León because we didn't have the time to go a longer way and also because of the money.
Money binds people, weights you down and you have all the time you want, you just have to choose.
answered David, finished his homemade lemonade (water, a few cubes of ice and juice from raw lemons) and lied down into his hammock. But we have to study, work, dedicate our lives to earn money to live, to be able to have a family, to get a girl and marry her, to buy a car so we can get faster anywhere we want, we also have the flight tickets so we have to hurry to catch the flight, we have to...or do we? Who decides what we have to do? That's why I left everything at home when going to this pilgrimage. It makes one look at his life from a completely different angle, realising how many things are simply not necessary and how many troubles are caused just by our own ignorance. Majja, the illusion we have created in our minds because we cannot perceive the world as it is, we can't foresee all the consequences of our acts. The only thing we can do is to do our best at the time. But honestly, not blinded by our own ego. That is good.
How do we know what is good and what is evil? Selfless acts are good! The moment when one acts simply out of love, not looking for any benefits for himself. Not imagining things in advance or thinking endlessly about all possible options, the mind has to stop. Just force the thoughts to go away. As easy as it sounds (or as difficult?). Meditation, prayer, relaxation whatever helps, do it. Stop the thinking, focus on the body, materialize the body in your mind, focus on the legs, far from the head. Stopping the wheel of thoughts is what means living here and now. Discover the origins of the thoughts. Most of the time we act automatically, not thinking about where does it come from. Is the thought, the urge to do something really good? Isn't it ego, sexuality, laziness, greed? That's why the good thing is to follow some moral code for example given by religions until one can see it clearly even without that (might be dangerous). For more information about yoga and moral read this article.
We have asked him where will he go then, how will he live? His answer was:
No direction! I will just go. God will lead me, God will provide.
No direction! I have never seen such a faith (I do realize that many people would call him crazy but where is the line between madness and sanity?) This totally got me. Losing ego, many people fear this. They think that it means losing their personality. Well it kind of does. One has to be prepared to lose literally everything. When one really decides to follow the spiritual path it has to be a firm decision with no compromises. The world, karma, fate, God will always make me be at the right place where I'm supposed to be. There is no situation where I cannot make a good decision. It's not about what I have around me, what I do, what matters is how and why I do it. Helping someone with no love means nothing. Again it's just about the thoughts! We have these bodies, they have learned something during the life, there are genes that affected them, food we eat, air we breathe, all that affects it somehow but we can work with all that. Use that in the best way we can. I was always afraid what would happen if I get rid of my ego, what about my hobbies, career, friends, family? Will I lose it? The answer is that I don't know. I might, I might not. It doesn't matter. That's the freedom. Love and compassion doesn't need anything (1 Corinthans 13:1-7). No direction!
Enjoy the way!
Focusing simply on walking, on the nature around but even that is just a craving for experience for the stimulation of senses. The joy and peace is inside us. It's the quiet empty place. Empty and yet everything and everyone is there. All is one. Yes, it sounds nice but what if it just doesn't work? Sometimes we fear too much, we suffer or we don't see the way. We give names to everything, labeling all the things we know. The tao that can be told is not the eternal Tao. The name that can be named is not the eternal Name. (Tao Te Ching) Try not to think in words sometimes, words, language, comparing, evaluating, judging all that binds us and can never truly express what we mean or feel. Sometimes we have to suffer to realize things, we have to get tired to be prepared to throw something away. It'll all come at the right time. Keeping my eyes open, being honest with myself.
Published:Keywords: meditation,Buddhism,Christianity,Yoga,religion,spirituality
#christian #pilgrimage #santiago #santiagodecompostela #camino
Privacy Terms