Are Volunteers Stupid? Why People Work for Free? A Secret Reward?

One of the most important goals in a life or ordinary human being in the modern society is to earn money. Money makes our life more comfortable. Why do people work for free? Why do they do volunteering? These activities are usually hard to do and without reward, right? I will share my point of view based on my own volunteering experience. Do not expect any talk about higher principles and abstract ideas, my view is actually quite selfish :D.

I have met many volunteers doing various kinds of philanthropic activities. It is sometimes interesting to listen to the reasons why people do these things. Don't take me wrong, I am not judging anyone now, I think that whatever reason there is, helping others is a great thing! Some people do it because of their faith and religious doctrine. Some people are simply bored and want to do something worth doing in their free time. Some do it because people close to them persuade them to do so or inspire them. There are even people who, sometimes unknowingly, sometimes intentionally, do these things to make themselves look better in front of other people or to gain popularity. Volunteering activities are also sometimes a part of a recommended therapy for people with mental health problems. Some cannot really express why, they just feel it is a good thing to do. Reasons behind selfless acts are main topics of many psychological researches. I am not qualified to talk about these things but let me tell you about my own experience. I have quite a few.

My favorite volunteering activity is visiting elderly people in the old people's house. I started because of my granny. We had her at home with my mom, but taking care of elderly people, even of loved ones and dearest ones, can become incredibly difficult and painful. She then moved to a retirement home when the situation was not suitable anymore for her to stay at home. I used to visit her quite often. I have always spent at least an hour there because she was one of the closest people I ever had in my life. Aside from talking to her, there was another lady in the same room. I have always greeted her and then talked to my granny. Later, she slowly got herself involved in our talking too and of course I asked her about her life etc. Then on my way home in the hallway, I used to meet another elderly lady who once asked me who do I visit in the facility. We started talking and after each of my visits I also used to spend some time with this lady as well, just telling her what was new in the world outside etc. I have noticed a very simple thing. These people who spend their days in such facilities are so grateful for anyone who is willing to talk to them! It is nothing to me. No real effort at all! Just a little bit of my time. But it means so much to these people who spend every day doing the same, being in the same room, with the same people. Yea, there are some activities that the people working in these institutions organize, huge thanks to them, but they can't be there with each of the clients every day.

I joined ADRA organization and I go to talk to elderly people every week for about an hour or two. At first I was a little anxious. What if I come there, nobody will want to talk to me, and the everything will turn to a cringy and embarrassing event? And guess what? I started visiting an old man, they assigned him to me as a client who did not receive any visits because he had not much of a family left. At first he talked about the old times, etc. I was quite happy after the first visit! Then after a few visits, he suddenly told me: Do not visit me anymore. I have nothing more to talk about. This was quite a shock! It is important not to expect too much. We are all different human beings and we all have our own quirks. Eventually, I noticed that the guy who refused my service actually started appearing nearby during my visits of other people. So I always sat next to him, talked for a few minutes and went to meet other people. Even though we want to do good, sometimes it takes a lot of attempts to find the right harmless way. It seems like this guy just preferred quick random talks rather than long visits.

What did I do wrong? Did I say something? Maybe I am not fit to do this kind of volunteering? Those were my thoughts. Fortunately, when I start something, I rarely give up so I gave it another chance and got someone else. It's been a few years and I am still visiting this man. And not just him, when I come to the facility, there are a few people already waiting for me, so sometimes I don't know whom to visit first. I see how much these people need social contact, and even though we often speak again and again about the same old stories from their lives, they are so happy to be able to talk with someone! Some people are also in a bad health state. Especially Alzheimer's disease, senility, just the brain being worn off. To be honest, these people are the best! First, I can talk about the same topic forever with them and they are always happy, I don't have to make up new topics! Second, their confusion is sometimes really cute and funny. I am not making fun of them, but sometimes they are just hilarious! One lady once insisted that I had to take some strawberries from her garden. She thought she was still living in her old house. She didn't want to let me leave until I go to the garden (pointing somewhere inside her room) and pick something. Took me some time to persuade her that I will definitely pick up some fruits next time.

So why do I go there every week? Because it's fun! It's not a duty, it's not a thing that I have to do. Similarly to people who just hang out with their friends outside or in a pub, I just go to visit my friends, have fun, crack a few jokes... Doing selfless things can bring a whole new aspect to one's life. Being more compassionate and kind might sound weak and, yea, it actually is! People want to be strong, powerful, but what about being a little bit weak, smooth, gentle. Life becomes much more peaceful when filled with these things. This is not a philosophy or religion. I just feel better, more joyful, even more healthy. It is completely selfish! This happiness created by helping others is not an ecstasy but a warm feeling on one's heart. It feels much better than most of the things we do for fun or to make us feel good! When we feel this inner happiness, we are satisfied and calm. We are much better people to talk to and live with, much more kinder and helpful. We are even more productive and motivated to do something in our lives. Volunteering is one of the things that I would recommend to anyone who feels lost in their lives.

I have also been involved in a programming work in a certain project regarding mental health aid. At first I was hesitant, the technology was new to me and I felt like not being qualified for this kind of job. What I found out is that sch thoughts often hinder us from doing great things. Sometimes it doesn't matter if we are qualified or not, we just jump into it and do it. Usually, the problem is not lack of skills but lack of helpful people. You know, I am a computer scientist. My manual skills are really low! Some people I know even make fun of me. You know, having two left hands or being all thumbs. There was huge natural disaster near the town where I live. I felt like I had to go there help. But c'mon, I can't even hammer a nail straight, what good will I be there? That's what I thought and the night before I went there, I couldn't sleep, I was really kind of scared and full of doubts. I went anyway. Came there to the volunteering center and said: Here I am, I don't have any skills in manual labor or crafts, I don't know how to build a wall and I have never done these DIY things that many people know. I just have this healthy body and I will do whatever I am instructed to do. I spent there seven days working and helping people who had their houses destroyed. I was never useless there. Always something to do, always someone around who gave me instructions! I have learned a lot there, but what's more...despite doing really hard manual labor for the whole hot summer day, my skin was red and sunburned, my stomach was like floating at a stormy sea from many liters of water that I drank during the day, but I felt so energized and joyful at the end of the day! How is that possible that after a day of relaxation I often felt even more tired and here, after really hard work, with the whole body in pain, I felt really fresh!

Of course there have to be certain limits. That's why I try not to spend more than two hours in the old people's house, for example. That's why I often refuse other people's offers and requests. I do not want to create a duty of the these things. I want to keep them fun and as a side effect, I can continue doing volunteer work without burnout or loss of motivation. I do not want to suffer, I don't believe that suffering of someone can really help others. I am picky about volunteering. That's normal, everyone inclines to different activities. There are activities involving mental health, elderly people, animals, environment protection, natural disasters, homeless people, well, many ways to help. Also many organisations that arrange these activities like ADRA, local Charities or Salvation Army. Let's do what we like and what also helps others. I don't do these things for free, I get a reward, a great reward! Maybe you believe in karma or fate or whatever that makes the things you do return to you. Believe it or not, doing good really brings more good to one's life. If not in supernatural ways, then people who learn about the things you did often tend to be more caring and helpful to you as well. Being a servant of others can be destructive! It is also great to talk about volunteering and to consult any problems, even mental, with people who take care of the volunteers. I believe that happiness can be simply multiplied by more happiness on both sides, of the ones who help and those who are helped. That's is the joyful way of life.

Keywords: philanthropy, spirituality, good deeds,
#philanthropy #goodness #joy #volunteer